cape disappointment

a rain streaked windshield left you behind
alone as the tears fell from us
and god knows I didn't plan to cry that night
or any night after
but your lost screams are the last things i can remember
of you releasing me, of me escaping.
now it's over.

i woke up on the ground after another falling dream.
please let me drown
in the soft wash of traffic lights changing colors,
yellow to red, on the ceiling.
it's so cold here and I want to freeze
so you see me in the morning,
watching me sleep, you think, through the open window
and slowly realizing instead i'm blue and dead,
then purple, then green, blue again as the sun rises,
and you'd be screaming again but I won't hear it.
stop asking me to come back to you!

you had never really known me
and you never will.